partd'08 [13] 笑口常开 :D

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

omg this sucks sucks suckssss
i sound like a whining brat
but i dont care!
i wnaaaaaaa sleeeeeeeeep.

and f**k i just lost control of my tongue today. this is shit.
where's the control and forbearance that you've learnt to value through the years?

i'm tired. but i hate to admit it -.-"
and i just really cant bear to bother anymore.
think, thinking, thought of
but never doing anything.
you're just a timid brat who's never learnt how to overcome his impediments and shortcomings.

DO SOMETHING FOR GOODNESS SAKE.

Endured till 12:11 AM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Saturday, November 21, 2009

looking back at chatlogs and archives from the past kind of warms you up from the inside.
you laugh at stupid things that you've said and done.
you gasp at how immature you were previously.
you may be glad at how you've grown in maturity and even language :D
but sometimes,
you'll find it sad that those chats held so much true exchanges of thoughts that you miss them so dearly.
i guess i cant let go yet.
and i think the definition of htht shld be restricted to "talks" as in like physically being present or at the least, chatting through the phone. and not "online chatting".
i wonder if you've noticed yet.
and i havent laughed like i did during tag for a longgg time. that shuang feeling of being able to laugh and not being able to stop. the laughter just flows and you really feel happy and alive :)
if you've managed to see this, dont tell anyone else.
maybe it just comes with age. the inability to enjoy the things that have become part of history.
so, there's a need to create more things that are worth enjoying :)
both of us are people who read alot into different things.
-
maybe it's this that will make you realize all these words,
reading between the lines. enjoying the small bits of life that's hidden within the simple things that we do each day, with our friends and family.
all i just wna say is,
and that's probably what makes life so enriching. its like chewing on a piece of plain bread. if you swallow it too quickly, you'll find that it's plain and boring. only after chewing carefully will you realize that its actually sweet :D
i love the moments that i've spent with you :)
and i think that was quite an imba metaphor HAHA
just like any other really good friend i treasure
mm and its sleeptime! night :D
you're just special in your own way :)

Endured till 2:53 AM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

its sad and quite shocking to have your first home visit during your attachment to a patient who's gna leave this world in a few days time.

but regardless of what happens, life has to go on.
that's why it's so meaningful to help their families cope in times of distress when faced with the prospect of their close kin passing away.

gna post about fac outing and my uneventful but restful day tmr maybe? when my headache's gone :)

Endured till 12:29 AM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Sunday, November 08, 2009

HAHA another source of inspiration! he's a studio wu instructor but he was the part a'03 ps according to andrew (our ncc senior from the part d'06 batch)

who says you cant be zai in dance if you study hard?
dance hard too and you'll improve de lor. even if it means progressing at a slower pace than poly students or school dropouts, at least you're improving :)

anw he said there's this trend of ncc ppl joining mad, esp when he heard of the current part ds who're practising to join bboy next year.

in his batch, there was stanley, yuhan (our hiphop j3 senior) and himself (from bboy). stanley was in council too, and he quit mad at the end of j1 i think (cos i checked isp)

then for the partd'07 batch, there's paopao in hiphop, karlton andre shenhong in bboy.

eh but our batch only has 3 ppl. jiehan's in bboy, im in hiphop and daryll's in both.

maybe next year there'll be more ncc juniors HAHA

-

morning we had pw and afternoon we went to amkhub to eat with the class. sigh and i got reminded about class tee HAHA aft ~~a levels!~~ pw its time to design the class tee! :D

before we went to watch radikal forze and bboy storm's perf, we went to watch daryll and daniel at studio wu for bboy open class.
HAHA and we were watching them and trying to learn by watching from the outside.
and i learnt new steps wahaha

though watching rf and storm live is still the most exciting thing for the day. wth you know that watching videos and a live performance is a hell lot different, but finding how different it is yourself is quite stupefying -.-
you see the energy from rf which exudes from every move lah. though it wasnt as impressive as all the other overseas crews but their moves are damn clean and they're proud of what they're doing.
that energy is sth we really need to learn from.

storm is just. dope. cant describe his performance in words. you need to watch to know. he's just a freaking imba popper and locker. eeyur. another of those unhumanlike people HAHA

-

haha but for me dance is just a passion. its not gna be my future profession or anything, that's for sure.
but while i still can enjoy dance, i will and to the best of my ability :D
even if that means spending alot of time on it.
because dance is where i know i belong;
where the people who're dancing with you are your treasured friends (:

perhaps it's just because we get to dance so much that we begin to feel less appreciation for the opportunities to dance and spend time together with the others.
maybe it's because everyone sees each other less often and that draws us further away from each other.

but everything will be better when dancenight preps come :D
when everyone begins to put their soul back into dance and struggle to cope with studies together, it is when we'll all be back together as a family :)

im already imagining how the entire group of us will be practising our fusion item at salt till late into the night, like how we watched our seniors do so 6 months ago. when everyone will be high and complaining about where they screwed up and laughing at each other.

-

my current favourite song :)

我已经变了，
但也来不及了

im always praying that by then, it will not be too late.

Endured till 6:59 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Friday, November 06, 2009

HAHA ITS SEVEN ELEVEN TODAY! (7/11)
today's post will be alot of random thoughts and its gna be longg so read on if you're bored :D

omg. i suddenly started feeling super excited about dance camp.
not just cause im part of the team planning it but

as you look at the programme outline (not even the detailed programmes itself)
imagine the entire mad gathering in the MADonald tee
(i bet the photo will be super bright lah omgg one whole bunch of like 50+ ppl in red and yellow shirts)
think about the fun from mixing with everyone
feeling like part of a big dancing family
getting to know each other better
learning from all the different dance genres

and its this anticipation about dance camp that's gna motivate me to do a good job together with the rest of the com :D
and hilary's damn epic. she cant type the timing for the programme outline for nuts cos her time in 24 hours is quite fail HAHA

for e.g, her 5:30 pm is 1530
and in another case, she put
Logistics:
Matthew Yang
Lim Liu Yi
Trixie
Deyi

HAHA lim liu yi omgg i bet liu yi will wna pull her hair or sth =P

ooh and kelvin shared about stuffs that he learnt from the dance camp for dance grp leaders.
he mentioned sth about movement techniques and stuffs. sounds quite seh lor maybe we're gna incorporate that into one of the dance lessons during dance camp. though we'll need a good instructor for that (prbly the one who taught during that leaders' dance camp), cos hilary asked aileen and she said the movement composition lesson was damn fail (i think, cnt rmb wht she said exactly)

anw choreography according to some economic expert website (yea no link but i saw this) refers to:

Choreography (also known as dance composition) is the art of making structures in which movement occurs, the term composition may also refer to the navigation or connection of these movement structures. The resulting movement structure may also be referred to as the Choreography. People who make choreographies are called choreographers.
Although mainly used in relation to dance the term choreography can be applied to various settings including:

•Fencing
•Gymnastics
•Ice skating
•Marching and Marching bands
•Martial arts film
•Web services
•cinematography

choreography is a type of a movement composition.

so what's a movement composition?
when you search online you cant find a definition of it easily, but according to this pdf file (which is some qualification recognizing one's knowledge about movement composition or sth)

Movement refers to a particular style of movement with
a specific vocabulary.

The definition of a composition is:
The combining of distinct parts or elements to form a whole.

so based on inference, i guess movement composition refers to the creation of a set of movements based on various elements ba.

according to what i read, it includes dance but is not entirely limited to dance.
a movement composition specific to dance is known as a choreography.
ooh learning new things by the day.

ANYWAY! read this blog its really useful and informative for dancers :D
http://www.singaporegotdance.blogspot.com/

-

im damn relieved that vern and kelvin's gna be with us till j2 :D
omg i cant really express how happy i am lah like seriously.
maybe spam more smileys? :D :D :D :D

though thew's 6 nov post is still damn depressing to read, but i still believe that we'll all get back together to have our regular pracs and improve as a whole once again soon :)

i know we all miss all those days of being bonded closely together and chionging pracs to meet expectations for dancenight, inspire, tapestry and teachers' day. and that's what dancecamp and dancenight preps are there for: they serve as the events which bring all of us even closer together.

-

im back to my daily dose of dance videos and gsd! (general studies in dance)
:D

anyone can dance. any sort of movement can be interpreted as a dance.
anything from the dragonflies' mating dance in the air;
fireflies fluttering at night;
the tribal dances about a fire, to randomly executed movements which may one look like he's simply thrashing about, to breathtaking bboy moves to sleek hiphop routines to emotive contemporary choreographies, they're all dances.

what truly differentiates a dancer is that he knows what's he doing.
yep. and so knowing more about dance is important too, not just being good at whatever dance form you're in.

recognizing that all dancers serve to express themselves through their dance genre is important too :)

woah that was a lot of content -.-"
mm time to sleep! night haha :D

Endured till 10:56 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

i still remember there was this channel 8 serial "dont worry be happy"
"敢敢做个开心人"

when you think about it now, you come to wonder:
have you been really trying to make yourself happy?

we all know that its totally impossible not to worry and be happy for the entire duration of our lives. inevitably, in each chapter of your life, there'll be a main challenge, a heavy burden that you have to carry or a problem that will be constantly on your mind.

yet there're exceptions: they're the precious moments that we spend sharing with others our worries, thoughts and troubles. they're the sweet times when we can share laughter too, while we rejoice in the opportunity to meet up to have a heart to heart talk despite our hectic schedule.

and i love those rare htht sessions :)
sleep time! nightt

Endured till 11:44 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

wahh
pw op
dance camp
remix and choreo for fac outing
class chalet
class shirt

bleah and i think i missed some internship thing. shittttt all cos i didnt read emb.

Endured till 1:09 AM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Thursday, October 29, 2009

yep junan. it was dumb to even think about it.
you once told yourself,
doing such a thing would totally screw up your life in ways unexpected.

seeing only what you wish to see.
placing so much impositions on myself
wasting time thinking about it

i've had enough of whatever shit this stupid feeling has brought me.
i have so much more things worth doing, worth thinking about,
so many more people worth loving.

-

i love the piggybacks that random ppl like ktoh give me HAHA
it makes me feel so immature but those moments are quite enjoyable =P

and that epic moment when larry and xining threw me into the paper recycling bin today. made me stink quite abit but yea it was quite fun :D
(but no im not gna let them try that on me again)

laughing at mabel's english for the parts she wrote for the wr,

jumping to try to reach the ceiling at right wing while laughing at ws fail (though he's 175 too) while daryll was like niaoing him cos ws's can reach higher than dar,

mr ram's lecture on training, success and attitude, which seemed inspirational (:

-
moving on to scream! (24th oct)

i screamed (or i would prefer to phrase it, shouted HAHA) like crazy during scream. i was not spooked out by the councillors lah i just kept getting shocked -.-"
so aft the entire thing i was like omg. freaking traumatized. and i think ppl wont understand the true reason why i shouted like crazy and knocked that hole in the wall (which is currently the resting site for athena fac outing poster HAHA)

it was the culmination of different feelings. but mainly cos scream made me feel especially frustrated at how freaked out i was. lalaaaaa

-

yep. im going to get rid of that burden.
and draw that freaking clear line.

i kind of feel a little more at ease now. it's gna take time i know but yea. this will make things a whole lot better (:

Endured till 11:21 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

ahh sad.

Endured till 11:31 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~

Monday, October 26, 2009

i finally couldnt take it anymore. i just flared up and let off quite a bit of steam in our classroom aft pw lesson ended.

seriously. i was damn shocked at myself aft that. like how i was stumped at my own actions when i made that um. empty space in the wall after scream.

i think by now the people around me more or less know i'm going on a mood swing.
(yep and so bear with me for now haha. i guess i just cant accept all the unhappy things that have been happening not to me, but around me)

promos.
people have been worrying about it ever since blocks results were released. at that point of time, many people founnd their results disappointing. the people who were taking it easy and doing the bare minimum asked of them were jolted from their delusion that jc was gna be easy. others who didnt find their results satisfactory swore to improve better too.

for me, i didnt perform that badly but i kind of felt nothing. people were like saying,
"eh bbccd results is above average liao lah."
"damn zai liao leh"

i remember i was thinking about blocks' results last time. to each individual, the idea of "satisfactory" or even "good results" are different.

even to those who kept saying
"aiya block results dont matter. just promote can le :D"

i know that regardless of who you are, if you're a student, especially one in hc, results does matter that bit even if you only care about promoting.

now that promos are over, most people rejoice over the fact that they're gna promote. what about the others who may face the daunting possibility that they may be retained?

and there're always those who expected to do better, but fail to meet their personal expectations. what about them? though they may have satisfied certain criteria, they may be feeling disheartened, having stumbled this time over this seemingly minor yet major obstacle in our years of education.

to those who may be retained,
年终考试仿佛像赶上一艘船似的, 若你不发奋图强，无法考到好成绩，无法取得上那艘船的资格，你就将被抛弃在原地上，无法在学涯中前进。这次的失败将使你终生感到遗憾。

i had so much trouble typing that bit of chinese omg.
but the main point is,
im feeling the heartache from the possibility that some people are gna be retained. i would give two hoots about people like the panda or some guailan kia, but if those people that you've come to like are gna leave you, its really heart wrenching.

and having to bear with the imagination or sight that certain people are really, really disappointed with their results hurts too.

coupled with the negative emotions i was feeling from the past week and the frustration i felt from pw that really built up when she was like being unreasonable with regards to the submission for wr, i totally exploded.

seriously. you need to find that balance between being firm but reasonable and understanding at times. that's why you fail so badly at being a teacher. that's why we HATE you. yep. i didnt expect that to come out from me, i didnt expect myself to flare up that bad, but i did.

today, you crossed the line. you broke the last straw. you finally pushed us to the limit for me, or probably the entire class, to really hope to see you out of our lives.

when liuyi pulled my hair aft i met the other mad ppl outside pe studio. i felt good. i felt something that i havent been feeling for a long time.

pain.

that physical feeling of pain. omg. it felt so nostalgic from ncc trainings. dont take what i said wrongly. i wont go and slash my wrists like some retards, my blood's too precious for that :D

maybe it's how those really emo people feel. how the physical pain is a manifestation of the psychological pain within. it also helps to numb all that bottled up negative feelings that you've been suppressing within you.

i just need to talk. like jiehan put it, mtmt. whatever.

-

on a lighter note, im 34th in the cohort for econs HAHAHA OMG SUPER RARE LAH
it's probably the first and last time im gna score so well relative to the cohort.
and 64.8 is A leh LOL
so my grades are
AADDE
chem econs math gp bio

not bad lah quite happy liao :D
so in the end my prediction's correct!

i knew my math and bio confirm screw up de. not enough practice and not enough revision -.-"

-

and that jealous feeling is back. bleah

Endured till 6:23 PM

With my rifle and my brothers and me~